This article was originally published on WackoJaco
A wise man once said: "It is better to remain silent and have people think you are a fool, than to talk and remove any remaining doubts.” Sometimes, we all ignore that advice. But today, it's not about us. Brace yourself and hold on tight: We are about to laugh at the worst offenders of common sense the internet has ever found. Apparently, common sense is not so common!
This Is Absolutely Not How the Year Works
Modern countries use the same calendar of 365 days a year. Divided by 12, we have months starting from January and ending in December. For most people, this isn't a revelation. Who doesn't know these things? Sure, people may not know precisely why the calendar is set up that way — it's based on the earth revolving around the sun — but that doesn't mean it isn't common knowledge. Get ready: Today is the day for an exception.
This brainiac wants to know what would happen if the year ended on a spooky day, Friday the 13th. What hasn't occurred to her is that there are usually around 30 days in a month. Since when has any month ended on the 13th, of any kind?
You Can’t Just Redefine Vegan Like This
Vegetarian, pescatarian, flexitarian — people are trying all sorts of meat-free diets these days. For many, giving up beef and chicken is the hard part. For others, it's cheesy pizza. Going full-on vegan is usually the last step in a long journey. But for this free thinker, none of that matters. According to her, she manages to live a vegan lifestyle while eating plenty of meat. How does she do it?
Well, the secret is: She doesn't. It seems this gal has had a pretty basic misunderstanding about the meaning of a word. We don't think that word means what you think it means.
The Nation of Spain Wants a Little More Recognition
We've all heard the term romance languages. But what is actually included in this category? Stemming from old Latin, this group now includes French, Italian, Portuguese, and Romanian. And, of course, Spanish! They all come from Europe, even though people speak them all around the world today. Here, it appears one social media sleuth missed that memo. According to them, white people cannot, or should not speak that language. Do they think this tongue comes from South America?
Evidently, that's exactly what is going on here. A simple history class would tell them the Spanish Europeans colonized the new world, not the other way around. Go back to el colegio, please!
There Is a Reason the Pentagon Hasn’t Recruited This Genius
According to North Koran dictator Kim Jong Un: "The entire United States is within range of our nuclear weapons, and a nuclear button is always on my desk. This is reality, not a threat." Yikes! But wait, how can that be true, if he is on the other side of this standard map? We know the answer. But this Twitter user clearly hasn't gotten a clue. Here, she seriously questions the concept.
Big news: The earth isn't flat. Just look at a globe! We thought that discovery happened a long time ago. It's time to rediscover that the California coast and North Korea are a lot closer than some think.
You Aren’t Supposed to Cook the Pan, Too
They say that cooking is an art, not a science. It might take many years of trial and error to get your own signature recipes just right, and ready to impress. But we must say, whatever this gal tried gets zero stars. We're giving it the worst review ever, in fact. Her roommate posted the dish disaster on social media, and common sense was not an ingredient. It's remarkable everyone survived!
The pan is now trash, no question. But can this melted stove be fixed, at least? We're not even sure what temperature had to be used to melt all of this, and we don't want to run the experiment.
Avocado Mysteries Are Probably the Best Kind
We all love to get surprises. Surprise avocados are even nicer. But what happens when you receive one every day on your lawn? For this fellow, he concluded there was some kind of plot going on. If that were the case, we wouldn't complain, like he is doing to all his friends. But maybe he's just not a fan of that green, fatty fruit. Or veggie. Whatever it is, he isn't open to getting so many.
Apparently, he had an avocado tree all along. It was lurking in the background, just growing on his lawn the whole time. Sherlock Holmes, he is not. But at least now, he can sleep easy.
Public Libraries Are Actually Not Rare
With the rising popularity of e-books and Kindle devices, it might be hard to recall the last time you actually cracked open a physical book. But once upon a time, that's all there was! Buildings to hold those bound papers are called libraries, and they were an important part of America from the very beginning. Good old Benjamin Franklin himself founded a free book concept called The Library Company of Philadelphia in 1731. The idea? To make sure there was an educated population. At the time, it was innovative!
Here, one mom wonders where she can find books for free. Her kid would really enjoy it, if only it existed! Imagine that there's a free book subscription, right in your neighborhood. What a world!
The Government Has Actually Had Your Face for a Long Time
These days, privacy concerns have become the talk of the town. Everyone thinks their devices are watching or listening to them. And frankly, they might be. We can't say for sure! It's worth thinking about, and we hope we get answers soon. But there is one thing we do know: The government doesn't need any special software to know what your face looks like. Have you ever looked at your driver's license?
This person is trying to play it safe and warns his friend about the dangers of AI technology. But he doesn't seem to remember that he took a photo at the DMV when he was 16. Oops!
This Is Not What We Would Call a Secure Hiding Place
The lucky among us have a doorman to let us into our place of residence. But most of us just have good old-fashioned keys. Losing a set is a big problem, so many people give a friend a spare. The more daring might place them under a doormat or in an electrical box near the apartment for semi-safekeeping. Burglars have mostly figured that one out, though. It's kind of obvious!
Here, mom made their job even easier. She put her spare key under a mat with a lot of holes in the design. Not the best example of common sense, but we still love her.
We Also Don’t Recommend Eating Shampoo
Some things sound logical at first, but don't hold up under scrutiny. Science can often be like that, which is why we have the scientific method. Hypothesis, test, conclusion. The earth seems flat. Is It? One sail around the globe conclusively proved that one wrong. On the internet, a lot of people try to spread a lot of theories. Do they always turn out to be true? Not by a long shot.
Here on Twitter, we've found one of those times. The theory? Vaccines are bad because you can't eat them. The suggestion? Put broccoli in a syringe and observe what happens. Or better yet, don't!
Motherhood Is Usually Pretty Self Explanatory
Daytime talk shows make their bread and butter on paternity testing surprises. You are the father. Or maybe, you are not the father! Either way, it does seem to be focused a lot on the mystery man. One Twitter user wonders why moms never seem to be taking these tests. A little common sense would have pointed her in the right direction. But not everyone has that gift, do they?
Most of us figured out where babies come from long ago. But maybe it's time to break the news to our pal here. We bet it's going to be really shocking!
At Least This Cutting Board Wasn’t Made of Wood
Plastic tends to do well with cold foods. It's also okay with some hot conditions, to a point. This is not that point. It's way beyond! When a wife left her plastic cutting board on the open stovetop, this was the catastrophe that followed. Maybe she didn't realize the burner was on. That's our guess, for now. But good intentions don't always matter when the heat is hot, hot, hot.
This is hideous. But at least she had a good sense of humor about it. And the house didn't burn down. If it had been wooden, we might have a fire on our hands!
The Modern Clock Is Not Really Such a Mystery
True love can really overwhelm people, we've heard. Sometimes, you can't quite remember what you ate, or if you ate at all. Or maybe, you can't keep track of what day it is, because everything runs together in your beautiful romance. It's all very understandable. But here, it seems someone is testing the limits. She claims he's on her mind 31/7. Since when are there 31 hours in a day?
It would be awesome if this type of time actually existed. But as of now, there are only 24 hours in a day. Our heartfelt advice: less daydreaming, more clock watching.
Bath Bombs Are Not Supposed to Be This Disgusting
Showers are consistently refreshing. Bubble baths are a tried and tested way to luxuriate. But the cutting-edge clean stuff is probably the world of bath bombs. They can get pretty fancy, depending on where you shop. But the basic idea is that a big, scented ball dissolves when thrown in the tub. It fizzes with citric acid, which helps to dissolve dead skin. Some people just like that tingle, and we don't blame them.
But something has gone terribly wrong here. What kind of company plans yellow dye when it creates a bath bomb? Obviously, it's going to result in a but tub of fake pee. Hardly luxurious, don't you agree?
Some People Would Argue New York Is in America
The post is dramatic: Goodbye America, hello New York. The girl is so excited to be leaving the country and heading to NYC. The only problem is that the city seems to be located within the United States. Yes, the 11th state to enter the union is still in between the east and west coast. There's no getting around this fact. But clearly, this Twitter traveler got around her geography class a long time ago.
It really shouldn't take a nerd to know these factoids. Doesn't anyone know where things are anymore? With so much google at our fingertips, maybe we need to get back to the basics.
This Person Just Doesn’t Know Their Big Cats
This cat chat got pretty convoluted, and fast. To summarize, someone asks if The Pink Panther, a famous cartoon character, is a lion. The response toys with the question, kind of like a ball of yarn. Person two requests that person one say the phrase out loud and think about it. Then, the word 'panther' is emphasized. The confusion continues, and no one really gets anywhere. Apparently, this is just not a familiar animal — pink or not.
Someone should go back to school for a biology refresher. A quick visit to the local zoo could also help. Or maybe, just some basic common sense.
These Are Just Terms for Much Smarter People
In high school, a few ambitious kids dreamed of being the Valedictorian. This final rank required you to have the highest GPA in the class, so most of us gave up long before senior year. Second place got the consolation prize of a title, too: The salutatorian. Admittedly, that was all a long time ago. Did this person here totally forget, or were they never aware of these terms?
Go back to school, you drop out! Obviously, the picture here is not twins named Salutatorian and Valedictorian. They are just super-intelligent brothers, with the best grades in their class.
It’s Time to Learn about the Concept of Ice
The world around us is made of matter, as we learned in school. Usually, it comes in three forms: Solid, liquid, and gas. Without a doubt, the best example we all know about is water. It can be steam in the shower, liquid in our cup, and solid as an ice cube. What exactly does this person think is going on with this frozen water bottle? They can't really think that someone shoved a bottle-shaped ice chunk into the hole, whole. Can they?
Common sense would say that someone just put a water bottle in the freezer. It probably looked like this after a few hours. But this person just isn't sensible. What can we do?
There Are Supposedly No Stupid Questions
They say a sucker is born every minute. Today, that's close to the truth. This gal seems to have some pretty fuzzy math. She wonders why the population of the earth isn't zero, since someone enters and leaves the earth every second. How could anyone even be here? She's got questions, we've got answers. Believe it or not, it doesn't take a mathematician or philosopher to figure this one out.
Even though the facts are true, they are not the whole picture. Births and deaths are not exactly 1 to 1. What if twins are born at the same time one man dies? Not a lot of common sense here, but at least she's trying to do the math.
Just Follow the Link to Apply to That Dream Job
The world economy isn't totally digital yet. There are some old-fashioned places, to be sure. But in many countries, the job market has moved online., Here, we have a newspaper article that seems to be stuck in between. They want to post a printed ad, but at the same time, they need to provide a link for the application process. The result was this ridiculous URL. Would you type this in for a million dollars?
We're not sure if we would have the patience. Too many letters. And too many symbols, really. There seems to be a real lack of common sense on the part of the editor. Obviously, this belonged on their site!
There Is No Way This Is a Safe Strategy, Sir
Some jobs are easier said than done. Surely, window washing skyscrapers is one of them. Scrubbing moss off the side of a building has got to be in the very same category. This fellow is trying to do the impossible and without the proper equipment. No, he doesn't have a crane or a ladder. He assumes putting his weight on a windowpane will work just the same. Will it, though?
The photo doesn't show a proper before and after, but we aren't so sure we can recommend the method. Not in good conscience! Overall, we'd have to say that this worker lacks common sense to a terrifying degree.
This Is the Least Legit Fake ID We’ve Ever Seen
In most US states, the drinking age was raised to age 21 sometime in the 1970s. Most underage kids think that's unfair, but for now, it is what it is. In Mississippi, things are no different than the rest of the USA. Southern boys and girls need a fake ID just like the rest of young America if they want to drink illegaly. Look at this version, created by Jose. Notice any lack of common sense in the design?
It's glaringly obvious: The photo has both a man and a woman. There is no way this can be real. At first glance, he will be kicked to the curb, and rightly so!
This Is Some Really Incredible Flower Power
Some people are called paranoid when they make accusations. It's not always true. If they turn out to be right, they might be called observant or clever. Today, we're definitely dealing with the first type of person. Is a sunflower spying on him from his neighbor’s garden? He can’t even see if there is a camera inside the plant. The stalk might be stalking him and it’s a terrifying prospect.
That could be what's going on. But then again, it might just be an innocent sunflower. Common sense should be your guide in these situations. This person appears to be running low on that!
Shipping Koalas Is Not Even Legally Allowed
Four hundred years ago, Europeans discovered Australia. Surely that was exciting already. But when they saw the local koalas, it must have been the most adorable discovery of their lives. We know we are big fans, and so is this girl. When she saw an ad to adopt a koala, she went right ahead and sent the funds. The certificate she received surprised her, though. Where is the actual live bear?
Actually, it was a symbolic adoption. For now, she will just have to make do with this fluffy panda toy she has for all her cuddly needs. Looks like common sense was lacking here, yet again.
It’s Time to Demystify Social Security Numbers
Some secrets are meant to be kept forever, like government ID numbers! According to the U.S. federal website: "A Social Security number is important because you need it to get a job, collect Social Security benefits and get some other government services. You should keep your Social Security card in a safe place with your other important papers and avoid giving it out unnecessarily." Would this Twitter post count as giving it out unnecessarily? We think so, yes.
This silly man posted a photo of his social security card online, and he seems to think no one can use it unless they look alike. But actually, anyone can use it, and it's time to get a new one!
Canadians Are Smarter than You Think
We all know the story: The Titanic was a passenger liner that sank in the North Atlantic Ocean, way back in 1912. It struck an iceberg, and water rushed into the ship. What a crazy movie! Or was it a real event? This is not a matter of life imitating art, actually. It all really happened, and honestly, most of us are well aware. Except, perhaps, for this Facebook fan.
Listen up: The ship was real, and the film was good. Can't both be true? There is no reason to lambast Canadians, either. Why the attack on your northern neighbors?
Now We Know People Actually Eat the Paper
There is an old saying that describes this common-sense disaster: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Most people do not eat the paper on chocolate candies once, let alone twice, or every time. What is this girl's explanation? She's trying to get to the bottom of the issue online, and she is getting tricked all over again. It's time for an intervention, and that means taking the Hershey's kisses away until she learns her lesson.
No, you're not supposed to consume the paper strip. Why would you even want to do this? Surely, it's time to stop eating paper. It can't be good for you!
Just Another Symbolic Fence Here
They say that good fences make good neighbors. In this case, bad fences make no sense. Why has this fellow constructed just the door, and left rest out? It's not functional as a fence, and at this point, it seems to be an eyesore. Online, meme-makers echo this sentiment. No one can figure out the purpose of this installation. If anything, it just makes handicapped use more complicated. Common sense might have helped!
If anyone in a wheelchair tries to use this path, they will enjoy it until they reach the door. Then, they will have to roll onto the grass and go around. Cut your losses, just take it down!
She’s Texting on Her Phone and Doesn’t Know It
Losing your phone is bound to happen eventually. It isn't fun to shell out the cash for a new one, out of the blue. And what about all those pictures you lost on the old memory card? Well, it's awful. This girl is frantically trying to find her friend's phone, as we all would when we can't locate the device. The only issue is that she is texting her friend, which means she's probably in possession of said phone after all.
It's embarrassing, but her buddy helpfully points out the obvious. No need to keep searching in your bag, dear. Everything is in its place, you can calm down now.
Electronics Really Do Require Electricity
Getting ready for work or a date sometimes requires some hair styling. If you're not blessed with ringlets, you might have to break out the hot device we call a curling iron. It's a pretty handy invention that lets you use different techniques to achieve volume and shape. But whatever method you may prefer, it doesn't work at all if it is not plugged in. This woman is about to figure that out the hard way!
Common sense applied in the appropriate dose would have prevented this time waster. Hopefully, she’s not running late already! It's not going to be an easy one to explain to her date or her boss.
You Actually Need This When You Go to the Vet
A veterinarian is a medical professional for animals, large and small. These docs treat diseases and disorders and even perform surgery. Whether it's a pooch or a pony, you know you are in good hands when you arrive at the clinic. Just one thing is required: You've got to bring the animal. This woman came all the way to the vet without her dog and realized what was missing a little late.
She must have felt a little silly when she explained: "I forgot my dog." Common sense says there was no other way: What could really be done without the pawed patient?
It’s Safe to Say This Man Is the Worst Passenger Ever
Trains have their hazards. Odd smelling people. Terrorists. Crying babies. Every element of society wants to ride, from time to time. And to be honest, not everyone gets along. They must sit peacefully together, shoulder to shoulder. Under these conditions, a conflict or two is bound to occur from time to time. When a fight actually breaks out, no one is surprised. This story probably takes the top prize, though.
This poor teenager was pushed aside by a sick man who thought he had the right to the special disabled seat. Perhaps in his mind, he did. But he didn't know that this girl was wearing a fake leg. In the end, she chucked it right at him!
Tires Have Ridges for a Very Logical Reason
Tires do come in different styles, these days. But that's really to drive on varying terrain, not a fashion statement. This gal seems to have misunderstood the point of those ridges and sanded them off for a new look. Lacking common sense, she did not realize that she might now slip and slide all over town. Why would you want to do that, intentionally? We sure don't. But then, again, we have common sense.
To review: Treads create friction to grip the road. We beg this driver to reconsider her smooth new wheels! This is a dangerous game, and we're staying far away for now.
That’s One Way to Thwart a Peeping Tom
Peeping Toms are more than just a nuisance. They are criminals! It's illegal to peek inside anyone's home without their permission. And the reasons they do it are far from innocent. We’ve all heard about them, and we hope to never meet them at our window. This person has been dealing with a creep or two in their neighborhood. Their solution seems to be this little curtain. But does common sense say that is enough?
Not really. It's time to file for a restraining order, or possibly move away. The decor is cute, sure. But overall, this idea is just putting a bandaid on a gunshot wound.
History Was Boring before Women Were Invented
There was a time, believe it or not, that women were not allowed to act. Once upon a time, men dressed up as women to play their stage parts. It was simply viewed as immodest for women to be out in public in a show. But the first professional actress in England started in 1660. And the movies had women right from the beginning. What is this crazy fellow even talking about?
Here, he claims there are movies with no women. We are not sure if we've ever seen a film without any at all. But what we know for sure is that women were not invented in 1990, as the second writer suggests. This whole post is senseless!